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Socially Inept

Never learning to mind my words, Forgetting to consider if they would injure or offend.  Abruptly ended conversations  Making me pick apart every syllable, Wondering if I've inadvertently crossed a hurtful boundary Once again.  Struggling so violently with what is publicly acceptable  To the point of feeling socially handicapped sometimes.  My ideas, words, and humor... Are either before their time or  Will never see their time. The constant frustration of Effortlessly helping others blossom,  Yet, being unable to reach those goals myself. How can one person  Be so socially inept? I should be quarantined  To an undisclosed location Where the only one to be verbally injured 
Is me.
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Safe Haven

It's disarming how the  Absence of your presence, Alters the very atmosphere  Of the world around me. The vivacity of the colors Seem quiet and subdued, As though they know My personal sunshine is away. The smell of the air, zestless, Without the rich notes of your scent permeating it. Nature's sounds are muted and hollow,  Because the rhythm of your heartbeat Gives them their beauty. The words around me Mean nothing because,  without you near,  Nothing makes sense. Every brush of my skin against something, Causing me to shy away. The only thing my body can stand now, Is your touch. My soul restlessly pacing, Trying vainly to watch over you Through our tether,  Needing you safely close again. My thoughts run overwhelmingly rampant Through my mind, Only quieting when you are here... You are my calm... Your arms, my safe haven... My face pressed against your heart...
Is Home.


The beauty of having
Always been a ghost,
Is it does not matter
When you are forgotten,
Since you've never become
Accustomed to being remembered.
The acceptance of always being
An afterthought,
Just seems like a part of who you are.
Knowing only that it makes you
Meticulous about treasuring the needs of others,
So they need never
Adjust to this way of thought.
When your favorite color is grey,
Chosen because it accurately portrays
Who you've always been...
A spectre...
Always fading silently into the shadows.
Leaving those around you curiously pondering
What they are forgetting.


Grey-green and sky blue gazes meet, Two souls caressing across space. The adoration in that connection  Permeates the air of the room. Like magnets, they are helplessly drawn To the proximity of the other. Fingertips reaching to touch,  To caress what they have each claimed as their own. Craving the completeness  That only comes when their bodies are fused as one.  Each knowing they could  Never belong to another... Their tethered souls would never survive without its mate. Each meeting of their lips, A testament to the love between them. The echo of their heartbeats, A symphony heard only from soulmates... The sound of two souls 
Intertwined for eternity.


Missing my sunshine Smiling upon my skin. The warmth of his gaze Heating my soul from within.  Craving his arms  And they way they make  My broken pieces align perfectly again.  Missing the way his blue eyes Always resemble the most beautiful of summer skies. His laugh emitting the purest vibration As it dances across my skin. Missing the silky caress of his kiss Against my wanton lips...
I am missing all of him.


Disrobing,  I stare at myself in the mirror Wondering what you would see  if you were next to me, Knowing I couldn't blame you  if you turned and walked away. I see the sagging of age  Where the suppleness of youth once reined. The wrinkles and uneven tone  of my once peaches and cream skin. Remembering how softly toned my stomach was now ravaged by time and motherhood. Wishing you could have known me  when I had the beauty of smooth,  unmarked skin to offer you.  Knowing I can only remedy the damage  to a certain degree, I grit my my teeth and wish for the best. 
Hating that I can't help feeling this way.

Soulful Guardian

Feeling your stress through our connection,  As though it were my own. Struggling to fight my natural need to soothe you... Knowing you are out of my reach. The torture is sensing when you need me And being helpless in the face of it. Longing to assuage your mind by whatever means necessary,  Whether in my arms or merely talking through your uneasiness.  Exhausting myself to the point of blissful black oblivion To dull my protective instincts. 
Still, I would always choose this over the option of you missing from my life.